The French
Oh man. So I'm in Paris. I got here this morning at like 7 in the morning. But I should rewind...
Last weekend I rolled up to Stuttgart on Friday cause all those Florence broads, specifically Aynsley, Maggie, Morgan, and Elyse were doing a weekend romp through Germany. We met at the Haupbahnhof and then I watched them struggle slowly with their bags and argue about what they want to do. They planned on "winging it." But, and ladies correct me if I'm wrong, they didn't really have the prerequisite ability to relax. Maggie was carrying a well worn Let's Go Europe! handbook and hotel reservations with notes sticking out.
So we walked around as Maggie tried to relive her nostalgia for Stuttgart (she allegedly used to live there) Then she called these kids she knew through her time here and spoke with a broad Americo-Schwaebisch accent. I introduced them to currywurst...they liked it. Aynsley used the bathroom at the currywurst joint without being a paying customer - it was terrible. We took the S-Bahn (not the Strassenbahn Maggie you clown) to the hotel they booked and then walked for 10 minutes under terrifying conditions. I was positive I'd have to get stabbed defending these broads' honor from some Turkish youth. The hotel room was nice though.
After they settled all their shit in, I was gonna show them how we do in Stuttgart...basically starting the night at the trainstation buying a bunch of beer at Yorma's and then sitting in the Marktplatz by MickeyD's drinking it. There we met up with Maggie's dreamboat German friends, Henne und Chris (Kris?) They were like 18 or something but this kids were great - like ironic German hip-hop heads. Then we went to this Mexican joint (why?) where we had eats and Long Islands. I was a fucking mess by the time we got out of there. Then most of the ladiez went home and the German speakings kids wanted to party more, which was stoopit cuz I was mad tired. Plus we weren't allowed in anywhere cuz Maggie's beaver skin coat was frowned upon.
When I came to at 4 in the morning for the first time, we were all in bed, it was totally akward and Chris was resting his head in my groin. Around 8 I decided I had enough squirming and we watched the Olympics. We went to the train and they tried to convince me to come to Munich with them. I didn't. I wanted to spend some time walking around Stuttgart and explored for a while...but then fucking, at like 1pm I realized that I was still drunk and a hangover started kicking. That totally blew...I took the first train back to Horb, but when I got there there were no more busses running to Talheim. There was a miserable hour wait for the Freizeit Express cab where I milled around the trainstation (which I've been doing a lot these days). The cab itself first had to drop off this woman fucking halfway to Zurich, and then was my turn. I was so miserable the entire time I was almost sure I was gonna have to make this fool stop in the middle of the Black Forest. I passed the fuck out and when I woke up it was too late to go back to Horb to the bar...whuddeva, I needed a good rest anyway.
The rest of the week panned out as usual. Ben was going to Paris, so I thought I should too...
There's a lot to talk about in the last day, so I'll do it a little later.
Last weekend I rolled up to Stuttgart on Friday cause all those Florence broads, specifically Aynsley, Maggie, Morgan, and Elyse were doing a weekend romp through Germany. We met at the Haupbahnhof and then I watched them struggle slowly with their bags and argue about what they want to do. They planned on "winging it." But, and ladies correct me if I'm wrong, they didn't really have the prerequisite ability to relax. Maggie was carrying a well worn Let's Go Europe! handbook and hotel reservations with notes sticking out.
So we walked around as Maggie tried to relive her nostalgia for Stuttgart (she allegedly used to live there) Then she called these kids she knew through her time here and spoke with a broad Americo-Schwaebisch accent. I introduced them to currywurst...they liked it. Aynsley used the bathroom at the currywurst joint without being a paying customer - it was terrible. We took the S-Bahn (not the Strassenbahn Maggie you clown) to the hotel they booked and then walked for 10 minutes under terrifying conditions. I was positive I'd have to get stabbed defending these broads' honor from some Turkish youth. The hotel room was nice though.
After they settled all their shit in, I was gonna show them how we do in Stuttgart...basically starting the night at the trainstation buying a bunch of beer at Yorma's and then sitting in the Marktplatz by MickeyD's drinking it. There we met up with Maggie's dreamboat German friends, Henne und Chris (Kris?) They were like 18 or something but this kids were great - like ironic German hip-hop heads. Then we went to this Mexican joint (why?) where we had eats and Long Islands. I was a fucking mess by the time we got out of there. Then most of the ladiez went home and the German speakings kids wanted to party more, which was stoopit cuz I was mad tired. Plus we weren't allowed in anywhere cuz Maggie's beaver skin coat was frowned upon.
When I came to at 4 in the morning for the first time, we were all in bed, it was totally akward and Chris was resting his head in my groin. Around 8 I decided I had enough squirming and we watched the Olympics. We went to the train and they tried to convince me to come to Munich with them. I didn't. I wanted to spend some time walking around Stuttgart and explored for a while...but then fucking, at like 1pm I realized that I was still drunk and a hangover started kicking. That totally blew...I took the first train back to Horb, but when I got there there were no more busses running to Talheim. There was a miserable hour wait for the Freizeit Express cab where I milled around the trainstation (which I've been doing a lot these days). The cab itself first had to drop off this woman fucking halfway to Zurich, and then was my turn. I was so miserable the entire time I was almost sure I was gonna have to make this fool stop in the middle of the Black Forest. I passed the fuck out and when I woke up it was too late to go back to Horb to the bar...whuddeva, I needed a good rest anyway.
The rest of the week panned out as usual. Ben was going to Paris, so I thought I should too...
There's a lot to talk about in the last day, so I'll do it a little later.
posted by malik at 3:12 AM
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